Relationships Part 3 – Communication
This study is about communication in relationships.
- Communication is a process that conveys understanding from one person or group to another.
- The focus is on developing understanding not just conveying information and words.
- Communication is not the same as conversation. Unless understanding occurs, we haven’t really communicated. (i.e. The message sent must be the same as the message received.)
- The sender (speaker)
- Must develop a clear concept of the ideas and feelings he intends to convey and be willing to communicate them.
- Must choose the right words, actions, calls for translating his ideas and feelings.
- The speaker and the listener-must identify and analyze the communication barriers that tend to hamper understanding.
- The Listener
- Must pay attention to the words or other communication tools and observe the actions of the speaker.
- Must have an honest desire to hear what the speaker is saying.
- Must be able to feed back the thoughts and feelings of the speaker that have been transmitted.
- Mehrabian and Wiener research has shown that as much as 55% of a message we send maybe communicated nonverbally through actions, 38% through the tone of voice, and 7% through spoken words.
- (Context – who is communicating; clusters – more than one gesture; congruence – the gestures, tone and words match.)
- Unmet personal needs create communication barriers, which draw attention away from the actual message.
- Conflicting ideas and feelings create strong disagreements, which hinder understanding.
- Personal prejudices distort understanding.
- Premature assumptions about what is being said prohibit hearing the whole message.
- Don’t interrupt the speaker.
- Don’t start forming your response while the speaker is still talking.
- Do ask questions for clarity.
- Don’t assume it you already know what the speaker is going to say.